LifeLessons: Advice From An 80 year Old Man - Source: EastAfricaDestination
Here are some tips to a good life from an 80 year old veteran and elaborated on by yours truly:
1. Have a firm handshake. - Remember the saying about a limp handshake and a limp you-know-what.
2. Look people in the eye. - Only a clear conscience can allow this.
3. Sing in the shower. - Its probably the only place you'll ever be good at singing.
4. Own a great stereo system. - So you can chase that neighbor that thinks he's noisy, especially if that neighbor is a church.
5. If in a fight, hit first and hit hard. - It may be the only hit you'll get in throughout the fight; attack being the best form of defense and all that.
6. Keep secrets. - You may need them someday to advance; Knowledge is power, no go turn basket mouth.
7. Never give up on anybody. Miracles happen everyday. - Keep bitching at that person, they may get tired of your shit and adjust; Remember the unjust judge in the bible who gave up when the widow 'no let am drink water drop cup'.
8. Always accept an outstretched hand. - Everyman needs a hand, you may use it to pull yourself out or dump them in the same shit you in.
9. Be brave. Even if you're not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference. - Particularly if they fronting too.
10. Whistle. - It might remind someone of his village palm wine tapper, but is also the closest certain people might get to music
11. Avoid sarcastic remarks. - It often times makes you seem foolish, but damn some people just drag it out of you by being foolish.
12. Choose your life's mate carefully. From this one decision will come 90 per cent of all your happiness or misery. - A mistake in choosing is one you would have to live with for the rest of your miserable life.
13. Make it a habit to do nice things for people who will never find out. - That is what charity really is.
14. Never deprive someone of hope; it might be all that they have. - Karma just might bite you in the ass.
15. When playing games with children, let them win. - Don't be an 'agbaya', teach them how to win if the do lose.
16. Give people a second chance, but not a third. - I mean once bitten twice shy, you can't be bitten three times;that'd mean u love disappointments.
17. Don't allow the phone to interrupt important moments. It's there for our convenience, not the caller's. - If its important, they'll try to reach you at a more opportune time or you reach them when important moments are over.
18. Be a good loser. - Be gracious in defeat, learn from the former president of Nigeria who is receiving accolades the world over till this day; not like those who go and berate others for their loss.
19. Be a good winner. - Be humble in victory rather than boisterous; who knows, there might be a cause for a change of opinion as in the Nigerian political terrain presently.
20. Think twice before burdening a friend with a secret. - S/He just might use it against you in the future; Besides, a secret is only a secret when its known by one person.
21. When someone hugs you, let them be the first to let go. - To prevent awkward moments: Particularly if its the opposite sex, but what happens when they don't wanna let go?
22. Be modest. A lot was accomplished before you were born. - A whole lot is still left to be accomplished. Don't brag, today's newspaper is tomorrow's tissue paper.
23. Keep it simple. - Too much of everything is bad; particularly when you lie.
24. Beware of the person who has nothing to lose. - They are ready to take you down with them.
25. Never waste an opportunity to tell someone you love them. - Tomorrow is not promised anyone, it may be the last opportunity you get to tell them.
26. Remember no one makes it alone. Have a grateful heart and be quick to acknowledge those who helped you. - You might need those same people tomorrow; as the saying goes, 'the toes you step on on your way up the ladder may be connected to the asses you would have to kiss on your way down'
27. Take charge of your attitude. Don't let someone else choose it for you. - Be yourself, avoid making excuses and blaming it on others.
28. Visit friends and relatives when they are in hospital; you need only stay a few minutes. - Who knows, tomorrow e fit be you oooo.
29. Begin each day with some of your favorite music. - Music is a salve to the soul, it just might be the difference in the way you face the day.
30. Show respect for everyone who works for a living, regardless of how trivial their job. - At least they work, you might be forced to respect those who collect.
31. Send your loved ones little gifts. Think of a reason later. - Be generous.
32. Marry only for love. - Love conquers all.
33. Count your blessings. - Or lead a miserable existence by dwelling on your troubles.
34. Compliment the meal when you're a guest in someone's home. - Especially when it tastes like sawdust, its common curtesy.
35. Remember that 80 per cent of the success in any job is based on your ability to deal.
36. Don't expect life to be fair.
Courtesy - Fingertips Entertainment
1. Have a firm handshake. - Remember the saying about a limp handshake and a limp you-know-what.
2. Look people in the eye. - Only a clear conscience can allow this.
3. Sing in the shower. - Its probably the only place you'll ever be good at singing.
4. Own a great stereo system. - So you can chase that neighbor that thinks he's noisy, especially if that neighbor is a church.
5. If in a fight, hit first and hit hard. - It may be the only hit you'll get in throughout the fight; attack being the best form of defense and all that.
6. Keep secrets. - You may need them someday to advance; Knowledge is power, no go turn basket mouth.
7. Never give up on anybody. Miracles happen everyday. - Keep bitching at that person, they may get tired of your shit and adjust; Remember the unjust judge in the bible who gave up when the widow 'no let am drink water drop cup'.
8. Always accept an outstretched hand. - Everyman needs a hand, you may use it to pull yourself out or dump them in the same shit you in.
9. Be brave. Even if you're not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference. - Particularly if they fronting too.
10. Whistle. - It might remind someone of his village palm wine tapper, but is also the closest certain people might get to music
11. Avoid sarcastic remarks. - It often times makes you seem foolish, but damn some people just drag it out of you by being foolish.
12. Choose your life's mate carefully. From this one decision will come 90 per cent of all your happiness or misery. - A mistake in choosing is one you would have to live with for the rest of your miserable life.
13. Make it a habit to do nice things for people who will never find out. - That is what charity really is.
14. Never deprive someone of hope; it might be all that they have. - Karma just might bite you in the ass.
15. When playing games with children, let them win. - Don't be an 'agbaya', teach them how to win if the do lose.
16. Give people a second chance, but not a third. - I mean once bitten twice shy, you can't be bitten three times;that'd mean u love disappointments.
17. Don't allow the phone to interrupt important moments. It's there for our convenience, not the caller's. - If its important, they'll try to reach you at a more opportune time or you reach them when important moments are over.
18. Be a good loser. - Be gracious in defeat, learn from the former president of Nigeria who is receiving accolades the world over till this day; not like those who go and berate others for their loss.
19. Be a good winner. - Be humble in victory rather than boisterous; who knows, there might be a cause for a change of opinion as in the Nigerian political terrain presently.
20. Think twice before burdening a friend with a secret. - S/He just might use it against you in the future; Besides, a secret is only a secret when its known by one person.
21. When someone hugs you, let them be the first to let go. - To prevent awkward moments: Particularly if its the opposite sex, but what happens when they don't wanna let go?
22. Be modest. A lot was accomplished before you were born. - A whole lot is still left to be accomplished. Don't brag, today's newspaper is tomorrow's tissue paper.
23. Keep it simple. - Too much of everything is bad; particularly when you lie.
24. Beware of the person who has nothing to lose. - They are ready to take you down with them.
25. Never waste an opportunity to tell someone you love them. - Tomorrow is not promised anyone, it may be the last opportunity you get to tell them.
26. Remember no one makes it alone. Have a grateful heart and be quick to acknowledge those who helped you. - You might need those same people tomorrow; as the saying goes, 'the toes you step on on your way up the ladder may be connected to the asses you would have to kiss on your way down'
27. Take charge of your attitude. Don't let someone else choose it for you. - Be yourself, avoid making excuses and blaming it on others.
28. Visit friends and relatives when they are in hospital; you need only stay a few minutes. - Who knows, tomorrow e fit be you oooo.
29. Begin each day with some of your favorite music. - Music is a salve to the soul, it just might be the difference in the way you face the day.
30. Show respect for everyone who works for a living, regardless of how trivial their job. - At least they work, you might be forced to respect those who collect.
31. Send your loved ones little gifts. Think of a reason later. - Be generous.
32. Marry only for love. - Love conquers all.
33. Count your blessings. - Or lead a miserable existence by dwelling on your troubles.
34. Compliment the meal when you're a guest in someone's home. - Especially when it tastes like sawdust, its common curtesy.
35. Remember that 80 per cent of the success in any job is based on your ability to deal.
36. Don't expect life to be fair.
Courtesy - Fingertips Entertainment
